I've been over weight ever since fifth grade and things just got out of hand when my husband and I dealt with infertility issues, the loss of our foster daughter and possible adoptions. I remember always surveying the room to see if I was the fattest girl there. I remember finding the biggest baggiest hoodie sweatshirt that I could wear or the nearest pillow to hide behind on the couch. I remember going to the swimming pool or the beach covering my swimsuit with a t-shirt and shorts because I was too embarrassed to be seen without them. I remember not eating lunch with the other teachers when I interned at a school because I was convinced a fat person like me shouldn't be eating. I remember being emotionally scarred by insensitive and hurtful comments that students used to throw my way. I remember believing every one of the lies that the enemy would whisper in my ear. "You are unworthy". "You are disgusting". "You are a failure". Every time those thoughts would enter my mind my confidence would shrink a little more, and the walls of protection that I was trying to build were quickly taking place. I was great with putting on a smile and pretending to be happy, but inside I was dying. To deal with the way I was feeling inside I went to food. I would eat to make myself feel better, which in turn would make me fatter, which would make me more depressed, which made me turn to food again. This cycle would repeat over and over again. I tried different diets, I tried to exercise, I tried to eat healthy ... but nothing could fix the ache inside, until one day when I discovered the Grace & Strength lifestyle.

I also feel like I am experiencing a deeper love from (God) because for the first time I have learned to love myself.

I just so happened to be reading up on some of the blogs that I always follow when I saw that my friend April had posted some AMAZING pictures of her weight loss journey. I'm not going to lie I probably went back to her blog 7-10 more times that same day because I was just in awe at what an amazing transformation her before and after shots were. Not only did she look amazing ... but it was more of the internal transformation that was shining through. She had a radiant smile and her eyes seemed to glow with happiness from the freedom that she was experiencing.  It was like the Lord reached out right then and there and tugged at my heart ... it was like He was saying I want that same freedom for you. She posted on her blog that she was becoming a coach with Grace and Strength and that they were offering a discounted price to join the program but the deadline was the very next day. I knew in my heart that I needed to be a part of this program. I knew April's story and I trusted her ... I knew that if she could do it, then I could too. The one thing that scared me was how in the world was I going to pay for a diet program? My husband had lost his job two months before and we were living pay check to pay check. After we both talked and prayed about it we made the decision that it was something that I needed to do and that we couldn't put a price on my health. We would just trust that God would take care of all of our needs throughout my G&S journey.

After just six months on the Grace and Strength Lifestyle program, I lost 80.4lbs and 46 inches!!!*

When I began my journey I was asked to come up with a ‘why', meaning what or who am I doing this program for? What will help me get through those hard days when all I can think about is food. My WHY wasn't for or because of anyone else. My #1 WHY was for me and it was that I wanted to be FREE. All of my life I have tried to hide. I had been over weight my whole life and had never felt comfortable to just be FREE to do whatever my heart desired. I always used my weight as an excuse and embarrassment as to why I wouldn't try things. I have such a care free personality that lives deep down inside of me and I wanted to set that part of me FREE. I wanted to live the life that God intended me to live and not continue to hide away.  I can honestly that I am 100% living out that freedom now. I reached my goal after just six months on the Grace and Strength Lifestyle program. I lost 80.4lbs and 46 inches!!! My outward appearance definitely has changed ... but it's the inside that matters the most to me. I am no longer held captive by those same strongholds that held me down in the past. Every day I'm learning more and more of the person that God intended me to be. I also feel like I am experiencing a deeper love from Him because for the first time I have learned to love myself. He has opened up so many doors for me throughout this amazing journey of mine; I can't wait to see where He leads me next.

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* Individual results may vary.